Politics will likely be on the table when Nick Difruscio joins his family for Thanksgiving dinner this weekend, and that has the Ryerson University student bracing for heated discussions alongside turkey and gravy.
Like many families, the 17-year-old business management major says his relatives are divided politically B次元官网网址� some are business owners who lean towards the right, while others prioritize social health care and lean left.
Their conflicting views can turn dinner into a minefield with the federal election around the corner on Oct. 21.
B次元官网网址淚t is very divisive, and it always comes up. It always gets really awkward around the table,B次元官网网址� says Difruscio, whose family is in Niagara Falls, Ont.
B次元官网网址淚tB次元官网网址檚 always (someone who) says something that goes a little bit too far, and it goes quiet. Everybody just kind of sits there.B次元官网网址�
Depending on the company, hot potatoes such as climate change, corruption, and the Trans Mountain pipeline are generally best left off the table, say various etiquette experts, but forthose who look forward to expressing their positions on issues they care about there is a way to keep things respectful.
ItB次元官网网址檚 unlikely your guests have much appetite for a screaming match, notes Leanne Pepper, general manager and protocol consultant for the Faculty Club, a private event space on the University of Toronto campus.
She advises declaring politics off-limits when the invitations are sent, and asking guests to come ready to share what theyB次元官网网址檙e thankful for this year.
People get emotional when talking to close family, especially with the wine flowing, she says, reminding hosts to avoid seating combative guests near each other.
B次元官网网址淵ou might want to hide the (lawn) signs over the Thanksgiving weekend. You donB次元官网网址檛 want to trigger that right off the bat,B次元官网网址� she jokes.
The host should set the tone, says Pepper, and be ready with an anecdote or fresh conversation topics in case innocuous chit-chat starts to run off the rails.
Michael Morden, research director of the Samara Centre for Democracy, says political debate is good for democracy and he encourages families to discuss issues of the day B次元官网网址� with civility.
His non-partisan charity surveyed Canadians earlier this year and found people were discussing politics more than they were in the lead-up to the 2015 federal election.
Researchers asked Canadians what topics they didnB次元官网网址檛 want to talk about, especially with people they disagree with, and found fewer than 15 per cent felt compelled to avoid contentious topics.
But the issues that made them the most skittish included abortion, immigration, multiculturalism, Indigenous issues, and sexual harassment and the Me Too movement.
Morden encourages participants to explain in detail what they believe and why.
B次元官网网址淢ost issues are actually pretty complicated and we donB次元官网网址檛 usually make space for that nuance in our arguments. When we actually have to think through the mechanics, we realize that we donB次元官网网址檛 know as much as we thought we did and that makes us more inclined to listen and to learn.B次元官网网址�
If things do get contentious, etiquette coach Louise Fox says you may have to bite your tongue. Some people just want to bait others into an argument, and a family reunion is not the time.
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B次元官网网址淪ometimes you have to say those platitudes like, B次元官网网址極h, thatB次元官网网址檚 pretty interesting.B次元官网网址� B次元官网网址極h, I never thought of that,B次元官网网址� rather than, B次元官网网址業 donB次元官网网址檛 like this,B次元官网网址橞次元官网网址� says Fox.
B次元官网网址淚tB次元官网网址檚 all right to have opinions, but if theyB次元官网网址檙e going to lead to arguments, avoid them and try to keep things light and celebratory. A sense of humour is your biggest asset when the going gets tough.B次元官网网址�
The Canadian Press
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