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BELMONT STUDENT VOICES: Learning the intricacies love

If thereB次元官网网址檚 one thing I could take away from all the unpredictably chaotic things IB次元官网网址檝e learned during my teenage years, it would be that love is like water B次元官网网址 transparent and colourless, yet essential to live.
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If thereB次元官网网址檚 one thing I could take away from all the unpredictably chaotic things IB次元官网网址檝e learned during my teenage years, it would be that love is like water B次元官网网址 transparent and colourless, yet essential to live.

However, this didnB次元官网网址檛 come naturally to me.

In fact, for years I had a tendency to decipher love as something I must have for someone else.

Trapped in that mindset, I had been unconsciously suffocating myself.

Meanwhile, indulged in my own distorted perception of love, I failed to realize that I have zero control over other peopleB次元官网网址檚 opinions or actions.

I became so invested in loving someone else, that during the break-up period, I felt as though my entire world was crashing down.

And then someone asked me, B次元官网网址渄o you love yourself?B次元官网网址

At the time, I didnB次元官网网址檛 understand why that mattered, and for awhile, I kept telling myself that what I was feeling was normal. After all, he completed me.

Right?

It wasnB次元官网网址檛 long before I found myself at war with my own thoughts, held hostage by my own internal conflicts.

Do you love yourself?

This always seemed to linger in the midst of my reflections, challenging my interchanging thoughts hand-in-hand. Puzzled, I began to realize that even if I wanted to love myself, I didnB次元官网网址檛 know how.

I didnB次元官网网址檛 know who I was anymore.

During one of my many moments of low spirit and melancholy, while scrolling through Facebook, I came across a quote that hit me hard: B次元官网网址渇alling in love with yourself first doesnB次元官网网址檛 make you vain or selfish. It makes you indestructible.B次元官网网址

From this point on, I stopped polluting myself for the convenience of others.

Instead, I embarked on a new journey of self endearment.

Starting small, I detached myself from my cell phone and stopped mourning over text messages that didnB次元官网网址檛 exist. Alternatively, I always smile at my reflection in the mirror each and every morning. Neglect never did anyone good. Advising myself that itB次元官网网址檚 okay to make mistakes, I learned to make peace with my flaws and be kind to myself regardless.

Next, I went about viewing everything that was happening to me as a learning experience. Shifting my mentality, I stopped allowing negative situations to ruin my spirit. Instead, I simply acknowledged them and continued moving forward.

As hard as this experience has been, and still is for me, itB次元官网网址檚 taught me that I am an amazing person with endless potential, with or without him.

I am beautiful.

I am strong.

I am like water.

Shauna Stubbs is a Grade 12 student at Belmont Secondary who is taking the Writing 12 class.


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